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Customer Requests: A Trust-Building Tool

Hello Product Leaders!

In my first official product lead role, I was at a large tech organization supporting the launch of a new division. I joined them just as they were starting to grow it, and I led one of the two products they had for 2 years.

Before I joined, after the interview process, they said I had passed all the interviews, but my future boss wanted to talk to me before they gave me an offer.

We met, and he told me it was going to be a tough role. I think he wasn’t sure I had what it takes. Telling me something is going to be a challenge does the opposite of scaring me, so after listening carefully to his warnings, I told him I was going to be a product manager, with their company or somewhere else.

I got the job.

Years later, I have to agree with him (no, not on me not having what it takes!). Product roles aren’t for everyone.

One of the challenges is that everyone (including your parents!) always has an opinion about ‘product’, and they keep challenging you. It sometimes feels like whenever you want to lead in a certain direction, someone will tell you ‘you're wrong’. They could be right, and it could be that you’re both right because there are no absolute correct answers in product work.

When people keep telling me I might be wrong, at some point, I start believing it myself. I found myself complaining to our VP of Consulting (who had managed product at some point…I know right...) about how everyone tries to tell me what to do. It’s not like me to complain, but I’m glad I did it that time.

He gave me an answer I didn’t expect at all, and it had a big impact on me. He told me that he knows I know my product and market better than anyone else in the company. In other words, he told me that he trusted me and that I should trust myself too.

It was a defining moment for me. It didn’t change much of what I did later on, but it definitely changed how I felt and managed certain situations.

I’m sure you know how it feels.

It’s really hard to lead when everyone has an opinion on what you need to do. It’s even harder senior stakeholders are involved.

But if you just do as you are told, you won’t be doing your job, and over time it might do more harm than good.

Here’s what you need to do to stay true to your real responsibility.

Let’s dive in…

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1- Understand the Bigger Picture

Before you can build trust, you must know what you are doing. With great power comes great responsibility, so before you ask people to follow your lead, you need to be clear on where you're guiding them.

The reason my VP of Consulting trusted me so much was that I worked really hard to know my stuff. I regularly met with customers, and when I did, I listened closely, trying to understand the deeper needs and not just their words.

I focused on serving the market as a whole, not just specific customers, because that’s our job as product managers (even though serving the market often involves working with specific customers).

I took the time to think about what made sense and what didn’t, aiming to provide real insights and drive meaningful discussions.

This is the foundation for everything else I share today.

2- Believe in Yourself First

Even after doing all that, doubts will still creep in. That’s just part of product work, especially when dealing with requests from senior, assertive people.

To handle these situations, you need to trust yourself and know you have a voice. You have valuable input for the discussion, not just the role of gatekeeper who says ‘no’ all the time.

I often see product managers not allowing themselves to think things through because they think their job is just to say yes and serve the business.

Remember, customer requests are just that – requests. You can choose to fully accept, partially accept, decline, or analyze them to find the real need, offering a solution without shifting priorities too much.

Give yourself the space to consider all these options, at least in your head.

Don’t concede before you’ve had a chance to play.

3- Trust Them

At this point, we’ve covered that you need to know your stuff and allow yourself to think and discuss things.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you’re the only one with the right answers and that salespeople don’t really know what they’re talking about. It might seem like they ask for features just to avoid hard work.

While that’s sometimes true, don’t start from that assumption.

Instead, have a conversation. Find out what they’ve done, what they tried, how they figured out that this feature is needed, and how crucial it is for closing the deal.